[Yeah, okay, that is super worrying. She just lets Ibuki pluck at her guitar, and has no plans on making her stop. She leans forward, though, a small smile on her face as she recalls her birthday.]
Mhm! It was a lot of fun thanks to everyone. I was a little worried when I first got here, but it was stupid to think that I'd be by myself. The only bad part was my hangover this morning.
Well, of course! If you're a good friend, it's only natural your friends'll show up to be good to you, too! That's why Ibuki made sure she showed up, even though she's totally nocturnal! I'm super tired!
[Hello, it's like, noon. She's supposed to be asleep. That's punctuated with a laugh, though, as she continues messing with her guitar.]
[But her tone does get more serious at the next thing Ibuki says, because she's taking it seriously and looks very uneasy.
... Honestly, she's not so sure she can handle really, really heavy topics.
She doesn't feel like she's in a position to not handle them, though. Not in Ryslig. So even if she's not sure, she determines that she has to be prepared. Not just for herself, but for Ibuki. And so, with a definitive air to her words, she says:]
[She stops her guitar playing again, shifting it to the side next to her - opposite of Makoto - so she can... Pull her legs up onto the bench with her, mostly. Wrapping her arms over top of it and looking away from her friend.]
You gotta promise you'll believe me, first. ... And that you won't like, leave or something. You gotta promise you'll sit through the whole thing, okay?
But this is... stuff you need to know if you really wanna say you trust me.
[Her reply is super serious, she can read the mood and she doesn't really intend on leaving anyway. Why would she leave when Ibuki's clearly confessing something so serious to her? She wouldn't. She couldn't.]
I'm not gonna leave and I'm gonna stay for everything. I promise.
... Okay. Ibuki's gonna hold you to that! If you break this promise I'll... Make you run a hundred laps around Mirai! Or race me to finish two huge sundaes!
[Way to stay serious, there.]
But, uh... to start...
[Another little shift in her seat, as she finally looks at Makoto again.]
I'm not really as good of a person as you think I am. Ibuki's done a lot of bad stuff... Stuff that you can't even imagine...
- And I don't mean, like, here? Everyone does bad stuff here, on the peninsula. But Ibuki's talking about back home. Back home, she was... one of the worst of the worst.
A hundred laps isn't even a punishment for someone like me, y'know. The sundaes would be more challenging.
[It's said completely seriously, too, even if there's a hint of playfulness to it. But when the mood shifts back to actually being serious, she responds in kind.]
... You were one of the worst of the worst?
[She's honestly having a hard time believing that one.]
[... She'll have to keep this in mind. Maybe Makoto would be a better rival for her races... But that said, she just gives Makoto one, small nod.]
Mmm. I was. ... And this is where it gets really heavy. Sheesh, where do I even start...
[Translation: "Buckle up." She even brings her hands up to rub at her temples a bit, as if she's trying to warm up her memory.]
... Back home, when Ibuki was your age, she was recruited up for this big name academy... it was known all over the world for having the most talented people ever. People who go there end up being known all over the world, too. They get kind of a free pass into doing anything they wanna do after high school, 'cause who wouldn't want someone who went to Hope's Peak kicking around? That's what it means when I say I'm the Ultimate Musician!
... So I kind of started as the best of the best. Maybe even the best of the best of the best! It's the same with my friends, too; Sonia is the Ultimate Princess, and Hiyoko-chan is the Ultimate Traditional Dancer. All my classmates were like that! We had the Ultimate Cook, the Ultimate Animator, the Ultimate Gymnast... even stuff like the Ultimate Yakuza Heir and Ultimate Imposter. They're all really nice, though, so if you ever get to meet Mr. Big Bad Yakuza Heir Guy, don't be scared!
But... a lot of really bad things kind of started happening with the reserve course. They're the guys who couldn't make it into the main course 'cause they didn't have talents and had to pay top dollar to get into Hope's Peak instead...
But they started to riot together, about not being treated all too great... and from there, they kind of started to go completely bonkers. They offed a lot of main course students. Like, a lot. I think my class was the only one that survived? Maybe the class after us did, too. I don't really totally remember, my brain gets all sorts of fuzzy around there...
Because my class went completely bonkers, too.
[Here, she pauses - looking at Makoto with some sort of expectancy, like she's waiting for that to sink in.]
[Honestly, it's a lot to take in and process. A school for ultimates? Okay, sure, understandable enough. Some of them were weird. Also sure, okay, whatever, things are kinda weird in other places.
It's the rest of it that horrifies her.
It takes a few moments before she even says anything, because there's a lot to unpack in everything that Ibuki just said.]
. . . And when you say bonkers, it was... the same kind of bonkers as the reserve course students?
[And all of the implications that come with it, not that she knows how deep the rabbit hole goes, but&mash;what could even make so many people do something like that? Even if they weren't being treated well when they should've been treated better the whole time, what even gets someone from being upset to murder.]
[She's quiet for a second, before giving her one, slow nod.]
The same kind of bonkers. It... um. Everyone called it... despair. Because what it was, was like...
Doing everything that could hurt yourself just for the thrill of feeling that bad. Just short of actually, like... Killing yourself.
[Another short pause, mostly to swallow hard; letting her legs fall back down off the bench, paws hitting the grass.
She kind of wants to grab Makoto's hand as she brings this up, but she's doing her best to give her space between the two of them on the bench.]
But they went and did that. After the reserve course took care of everyone but us in the school, they killed themselves, all of'em. And from there... My class destroyed what was left of the school so we could pretend we were dead, too. And we separated, to try and spread that despair to the rest of the world...
And we did a lot of bad stuff, like that. Really bad stuff. Hurting the people we love, hurting each other, hurting ourselves... all just to feel that rush of feeling awful. I-I think I... might've axed my old band... my memories are pretty fuzzy, though.
... And even then, that doesn't really square up to what me'n Hiyoko-chan did.
[Which she is, yes, implying that whatever she and Hiyoko did? Worse than killing her old band. Worse.
She's also keeping herself from mentioning Junko or Chiaki on purpose. Yeah, there is something out there that makes someone go that completely off the deep end, but...
She'd rather Makoto form an opinion on the acts first, not the reason behind it.]
We... me and my class - we ended up going so far that... We ended the world... Ibuki's world is super dead, now. Everyone back there's tryin' to clean up our mess, but there's not a lotta people left...
...
You get why Ibuki's telling you about all this, right?
[She has to let that sink in again. She's just an idol from a normal place, and this is... next level. There's so much to unpack in all of these statements and she's having an incredibly hard time wrapping her brain around the seriousness of what she's being told and how it could even happen.
She honestly feels a little dizzy as she absorbs what she's being told.
Makoto swallows thickly, before answering Ibuki.]
Yeah. I do.
[It takes her a little bit longer before she says anything about the acts, though. There's so much death. So much pain. She wasn't expecting the rabbit hole to go so deep, but who does?]
I'm sorry, I just—It all seems so unbelievable to me. I'm not saying it didn't happen, it's just... I don't... know what to say. It's awful.
[She finishes her sentence lamely, not even knowing what to think or do.]
[Ibuki shakes her head with that, a little dismissively.]
Nah, it's okay. It sounds totally unbelievable, right? That someone like Ibuki could just up and snap like that. But, um...
It was... a girl. Junko Enoshima. She was the Ultimate Fashionista, I think? Ibuki doesn't really know what she did to the reserve course, but what she did to us...
[She trails off, here, actually... thinking about it again. Remembering it, as clear as day. Seeing their friend up on that big, wrap-around screen, tormented and struggling just to get back to all of them - only to die horrifically.
... She actually seems to zone out for a moment, staring at the grass with a deeply concerning look; something between a mix of heavy thought and fear. It's really out of place on the face of the usually bubbly and cheerful Ibuki.]
[... But it's only there for that moment, before she blinks and shakes her head to get herself out of it. Bringing one hand up to cup her temple, running her claws through her bangs with a heavy sigh.]
- Um, to make a long story really, super, ultra short - She kinda brainwashed us? Sorta? A little?
She kidnapped one of our best, closest friends, and... stuck the rest of us all in this dark room, and... Made us watch as she tortured her. It just kinda... made us all go bonkers.
And then we destroyed the world. We got, uh - Saved? Kinda? By... someone else named Makoto, actually! He rounded us all up and stuck us in this virtual thingy that was meant to get rid of all those memories so we'd be normal again! Even though it went totally tits-up and a lot of us fakey-died in that virtual world, but it's okay!
It's okay, because we're alive now!
[Is it okay? She sounds like she's trying to be, but kind of failing...]
[Makoto watches Ibuki's reactions to even just talk about it, and that alone is enough to prove that it wasn't ever something she wanted to do, no matter how outlandish and out of this world the entire scenario seems. Also, she's not really convinced Ibuki's a good liar, all things considered.
How could... one person just do that to other people? Cause them to kill themselves, cause them to fall into despair by making them watch a classmate die. What the hell was wrong with that person!? Even if it led to Ibuki and her classmates doing bad things, how could she even do that. It doesn't change Ibuki's actions, but she's... genuinely sorrowful, and that means a lot, and while bad things happened, it doesn't mean that she herself is automatically a bad person. Doing bad things does not always mean you're a bad person, especially when there are other influences.
Her expression quickly shifts from one of confusion to anger. Her voice is loud, too, when she finally speaks.]
None of that is okay, though! Even if you were saved, no one should have to die or be brainwashed or watch other people die or any of that! What the hell is wrong with her? Damn it...
[It's not okay. Nothing about this entire situation is okay.]
[Oh, good, then she doesn't have to find out via Ibuki actually trying to lie.
That said, though, Makoto's outburst actually gets her to jump a second time, before her ears fold in further against her hair, as she reaches out weakly to her friend - Only to seem to think better of it partway, and draw her hand back toward herself.]
No, no, Ibuki wasn't saying that's okay... she knows it's not. She's saying it's okay, 'cause...
[... Why is she saying it's okay? She ends up trailing off again, looking like the cogs in her brain are churning, before just... Shrugging.]
... No, it's not okay. It wasn't okay, and even though Ibuki and her friends did what they could to make up for everything they did... it's still not gonna be okay...
But she's dead... So that's okay, at least. She died, and it was forever; not like Ibuki's fakey-death in the memory machine. So now that we're all out of everyone's hair, at least that world can start to go back to something better. My class hopped on a boat to go find someplace where there's no one else, so no one has to worry about having us around, and the Makoto-chan of that world [- The one who saved them -] started to work on making things good again.
[It's said with a strangely solemn tone of voice.]
[- Until she lets her face pop back open into a bubbly smile, turning that back onto Makoto.]
... And Ibuki's here now, anyway! Here, where she can try to make friends and music that'll actually make people happy, and fans who like listening to what she plays! And live a real, actual life!
Ibuki... really likes it here! So everything's okay at the end of everything, right? No one's hurt anymore, and that world's healing back up like someone pumped it fulla steroids, and I'm here where I can live a real life...!
[Probably weird to think about someone who loves being in Ryslig. But hey, there's firsts for everything.]
[No, Makoto reaches out and takes Ibuki's hand, giving it a squeeze.]
It's not okay.
[At least Ibuki's class just... went off somewhere where no one could worry. It's only reasonable that the world would be concered about Ibuki and her class after everything that happened, but all the same... they never should have been put in that position, and while Makoto is typically not the sort of person to wish death on someone, it's almost a little relieving to know that that person is dead. It's not okay what Ibuki and them did, but she can understand all of the other factors that went with it.
She pauses when she realizes what she said, after everything, and elaborates.]
I mean, it's okay here, just not okay there. You know what I mean, right? At... least you have this place, even if it's kinda... [Well, it's a lot of different things, and most of her descriptors aren't good.]
I just don't understand how someone could... just do that kind of thing to so many people. What the hell.
Mmm, Ibuki likes this place. Even the bad parts aren't... that bad, compared to back there. A-actually, Teruteru-chan might've made all his Ultimate Despair food out of...
[... Well, there's only one logical ending to that. And it has her pausing for a second.
But she shakes her head again, trying to get the thought out of her brain - Before she leaps back off the bench onto her paws, holding tight to Makoto's hand before taking it in both of hers.]
It doesn't matter why she did it. Right? It doesn't matter, now that Ibuki's not there anymore! What matters is what she can do here and now. And right here and right now...
Ibuki wants you to know that she's really excited to someday be your friend.
Having people here who listen to what I say and take me seriously... is really, really new. And it's even newer to have someone who wants to learn from me, so... It's really important that you know how excited I am for that, okay?
To someday really, really be your friend.
[... She's talking like they're not. Or even haven't been, despite the things Ibuki's done, like inviting her wholeheartedly into her club and buying her a brand new guitar...]
["Teruteru might've made all his Ultimate Despair food out of... Honestly, Ibuki doesn't even need to finish that. There is a logical end to it, and Makoto doesn't want to hear it because she can fill in the blank well enough herself.]
It does matter, though. She still did it to you, y'know? Even if things are different here, that doesn't change what happened in the past...
[But then she listens to how Ibuki is talking, like they weren't friends already, like... what? It's like she's already assumed that Makoto's decided to just not be her friend anymore, or change her stance on things for whatever reason. She's not going to change her stance on trusting Ibuki, nor is she going to change her stance on them being friends. She's determined for that. Ibuki opened up to her, after all.
Ibuki may have done bad things but that doesn't necessarily make her a bad person. She obviously regrets and wants to do better. Things are different, right? So it's... not fine, but Makoto can appreciate the effort put forth by them to be better and do better and that goes a long way in the end.
It's still kind of hard to wrap her mind around the scale of the problem, she's never thought of anything on that scale that wasn't just performing on the world stage.]
Oi, don't talk like we aren't friends, Ibuki-chan. You're acting like I've already made my mind up that we aren't friends now! We are. Even if you didn't do good things, you're trying to be better and do better. If I weren't your friend, I wouldn't have sat here and listened.
[Oh, no, it's not that. Sure, Ibuki wouldn't have blamed her for deciding they need to get closer before they could really be friends. But no, this runs a little... deeper than that.
In fact, she looks at her for a moment with a bit of surprise, still holding her hand with both of hers.]
... We're already friends? Even though we've only known each other a li'l while? We're already friends? Really?
[See this look? This face of surprise at being called friends? This is the face of a woman with trust issues deeper than the Grand Canyon, Makoto.
[Hooboy Ibuki, there is so much to unpack about you and she's not even sure where to start. But she's fine with the work and trying to understand. She's determined to be Ibuki's friend, and this ain't gonna stop her.]
Well, we only met like, a month ago... Aren't people usually still strangers by now?
[That's said as she finally lets go of Makoto's hand - In favor of bringing her own up in front of her, shyly pushing a couple fingertips together.
Yeah, there's a lot behind all that hair, but hey. If Makoto's willing to try and unpack it, she'll have a pretty loyal friend for life! Just ask Sonia.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Mhm! It was a lot of fun thanks to everyone. I was a little worried when I first got here, but it was stupid to think that I'd be by myself. The only bad part was my hangover this morning.
1/2
That's why Ibuki made sure she showed up, even though she's totally nocturnal!
I'm super tired!
[Hello, it's like, noon. She's supposed to be asleep.
That's punctuated with a laugh, though, as she continues messing with her guitar.]
no subject
Mmm, that's kinda what this is about, though... since you said you trust and depend on Ibuki, she felt -
Uh...
I felt it was probably... important that I told you some stuff.
You can handle some heavy topics, right? ... Really, really heavy ones?
1/2
[She says, in something of a chiding tone, but there's obviously no malice behind her words.]
no subject
... Honestly, she's not so sure she can handle really, really heavy topics.
She doesn't feel like she's in a position to not handle them, though. Not in Ryslig. So even if she's not sure, she determines that she has to be prepared. Not just for herself, but for Ibuki. And so, with a definitive air to her words, she says:]
I can. What's up, Ibuki-chan?
no subject
[She stops her guitar playing again, shifting it to the side next to her - opposite of Makoto - so she can...
Pull her legs up onto the bench with her, mostly. Wrapping her arms over top of it and looking away from her friend.]
You gotta promise you'll believe me, first. ... And that you won't like, leave or something.
You gotta promise you'll sit through the whole thing, okay?
But this is... stuff you need to know if you really wanna say you trust me.
no subject
I'm not gonna leave and I'm gonna stay for everything. I promise.
no subject
... Okay. Ibuki's gonna hold you to that! If you break this promise I'll...
Make you run a hundred laps around Mirai!
Or race me to finish two huge sundaes!
[Way to stay serious, there.]
But, uh... to start...
[Another little shift in her seat, as she finally looks at Makoto again.]
I'm not really as good of a person as you think I am. Ibuki's done a lot of bad stuff...
Stuff that you can't even imagine...
- And I don't mean, like, here? Everyone does bad stuff here, on the peninsula.
But Ibuki's talking about back home.
Back home, she was... one of the worst of the worst.
no subject
[It's said completely seriously, too, even if there's a hint of playfulness to it. But when the mood shifts back to actually being serious, she responds in kind.]
... You were one of the worst of the worst?
[She's honestly having a hard time believing that one.]
1/2 this is getting meaty
But that said, she just gives Makoto one, small nod.]
Mmm. I was. ... And this is where it gets really heavy.
Sheesh, where do I even start...
[Translation: "Buckle up."
She even brings her hands up to rub at her temples a bit, as if she's trying to warm up her memory.]
... Back home, when Ibuki was your age, she was recruited up for this big name academy... it was known all over the world for having the most talented people ever. People who go there end up being known all over the world, too.
They get kind of a free pass into doing anything they wanna do after high school, 'cause who wouldn't want someone who went to Hope's Peak kicking around?
That's what it means when I say I'm the Ultimate Musician!
... So I kind of started as the best of the best. Maybe even the best of the best of the best!
It's the same with my friends, too; Sonia is the Ultimate Princess, and Hiyoko-chan is the Ultimate Traditional Dancer. All my classmates were like that!
We had the Ultimate Cook, the Ultimate Animator, the Ultimate Gymnast... even stuff like the Ultimate Yakuza Heir and Ultimate Imposter.
They're all really nice, though, so if you ever get to meet Mr. Big Bad Yakuza Heir Guy, don't be scared!
no subject
They're the guys who couldn't make it into the main course 'cause they didn't have talents and had to pay top dollar to get into Hope's Peak instead...
But they started to riot together, about not being treated all too great... and from there, they kind of started to go completely bonkers. They offed a lot of main course students. Like, a lot.
I think my class was the only one that survived? Maybe the class after us did, too. I don't really totally remember, my brain gets all sorts of fuzzy around there...
Because my class went completely bonkers, too.
[Here, she pauses - looking at Makoto with some sort of expectancy, like she's waiting for that to sink in.]
no subject
It's the rest of it that horrifies her.
It takes a few moments before she even says anything, because there's a lot to unpack in everything that Ibuki just said.]
. . . And when you say bonkers, it was... the same kind of bonkers as the reserve course students?
[And all of the implications that come with it, not that she knows how deep the rabbit hole goes, but&mash;what could even make so many people do something like that? Even if they weren't being treated well when they should've been treated better the whole time, what even gets someone from being upset to murder.]
no subject
The same kind of bonkers. It... um. Everyone called it... despair.
Because what it was, was like...
Doing everything that could hurt yourself just for the thrill of feeling that bad. Just short of actually, like...
Killing yourself.
[Another short pause, mostly to swallow hard; letting her legs fall back down off the bench, paws hitting the grass.
She kind of wants to grab Makoto's hand as she brings this up, but she's doing her best to give her space between the two of them on the bench.]
But they went and did that. After the reserve course took care of everyone but us in the school, they killed themselves, all of'em.
And from there...
My class destroyed what was left of the school so we could pretend we were dead, too. And we separated, to try and spread that despair to the rest of the world...
And we did a lot of bad stuff, like that. Really bad stuff. Hurting the people we love, hurting each other, hurting ourselves... all just to feel that rush of feeling awful.
I-I think I... might've axed my old band... my memories are pretty fuzzy, though.
... And even then, that doesn't really square up to what me'n Hiyoko-chan did.
[Which she is, yes, implying that whatever she and Hiyoko did? Worse than killing her old band.
Worse.
She's also keeping herself from mentioning Junko or Chiaki on purpose. Yeah, there is something out there that makes someone go that completely off the deep end, but...
She'd rather Makoto form an opinion on the acts first, not the reason behind it.]
We... me and my class - we ended up going so far that...
We ended the world...
Ibuki's world is super dead, now. Everyone back there's tryin' to clean up our mess, but there's not a lotta people left...
...
You get why Ibuki's telling you about all this, right?
no subject
She honestly feels a little dizzy as she absorbs what she's being told.
Makoto swallows thickly, before answering Ibuki.]
Yeah. I do.
[It takes her a little bit longer before she says anything about the acts, though. There's so much death. So much pain. She wasn't expecting the rabbit hole to go so deep, but who does?]
I'm sorry, I just—It all seems so unbelievable to me. I'm not saying it didn't happen, it's just... I don't... know what to say. It's awful.
[She finishes her sentence lamely, not even knowing what to think or do.]
What made that happen?
1/2
Nah, it's okay. It sounds totally unbelievable, right? That someone like Ibuki could just up and snap like that.
But, um...
It was... a girl. Junko Enoshima. She was the Ultimate Fashionista, I think? Ibuki doesn't really know what she did to the reserve course, but what she did to us...
[She trails off, here, actually... thinking about it again. Remembering it, as clear as day.
Seeing their friend up on that big, wrap-around screen, tormented and struggling just to get back to all of them - only to die horrifically.
... She actually seems to zone out for a moment, staring at the grass with a deeply concerning look; something between a mix of heavy thought and fear.
It's really out of place on the face of the usually bubbly and cheerful Ibuki.]
no subject
Bringing one hand up to cup her temple, running her claws through her bangs with a heavy sigh.]
- Um, to make a long story really, super, ultra short -
She kinda brainwashed us? Sorta? A little?
She kidnapped one of our best, closest friends, and... stuck the rest of us all in this dark room, and...
Made us watch as she tortured her.
It just kinda... made us all go bonkers.
And then we destroyed the world. We got, uh -
Saved? Kinda? By... someone else named Makoto, actually!
He rounded us all up and stuck us in this virtual thingy that was meant to get rid of all those memories so we'd be normal again!
Even though it went totally tits-up and a lot of us fakey-died in that virtual world, but it's okay!
It's okay, because we're alive now!
[Is it okay? She sounds like she's trying to be, but kind of failing...]
no subject
How could... one person just do that to other people? Cause them to kill themselves, cause them to fall into despair by making them watch a classmate die. What the hell was wrong with that person!? Even if it led to Ibuki and her classmates doing bad things, how could she even do that. It doesn't change Ibuki's actions, but she's... genuinely sorrowful, and that means a lot, and while bad things happened, it doesn't mean that she herself is automatically a bad person. Doing bad things does not always mean you're a bad person, especially when there are other influences.
Her expression quickly shifts from one of confusion to anger. Her voice is loud, too, when she finally speaks.]
None of that is okay, though! Even if you were saved, no one should have to die or be brainwashed or watch other people die or any of that! What the hell is wrong with her? Damn it...
[It's not okay. Nothing about this entire situation is okay.]
1/2 lots of these today
That said, though, Makoto's outburst actually gets her to jump a second time, before her ears fold in further against her hair, as she reaches out weakly to her friend -
Only to seem to think better of it partway, and draw her hand back toward herself.]
No, no, Ibuki wasn't saying that's okay... she knows it's not. She's saying it's okay, 'cause...
[... Why is she saying it's okay? She ends up trailing off again, looking like the cogs in her brain are churning, before just...
Shrugging.]
... No, it's not okay. It wasn't okay, and even though Ibuki and her friends did what they could to make up for everything they did... it's still not gonna be okay...
But she's dead... So that's okay, at least. She died, and it was forever; not like Ibuki's fakey-death in the memory machine.
So now that we're all out of everyone's hair, at least that world can start to go back to something better.
My class hopped on a boat to go find someplace where there's no one else, so no one has to worry about having us around, and the Makoto-chan of that world [- The one who saved them -] started to work on making things good again.
[It's said with a strangely solemn tone of voice.]
no subject
... And Ibuki's here now, anyway!
Here, where she can try to make friends and music that'll actually make people happy, and fans who like listening to what she plays!
And live a real, actual life!
Ibuki... really likes it here! So everything's okay at the end of everything, right?
No one's hurt anymore, and that world's healing back up like someone pumped it fulla steroids, and I'm here where I can live a real life...!
[Probably weird to think about someone who loves being in Ryslig. But hey, there's firsts for everything.]
no subject
It's not okay.
[At least Ibuki's class just... went off somewhere where no one could worry. It's only reasonable that the world would be concered about Ibuki and her class after everything that happened, but all the same... they never should have been put in that position, and while Makoto is typically not the sort of person to wish death on someone, it's almost a little relieving to know that that person is dead. It's not okay what Ibuki and them did, but she can understand all of the other factors that went with it.
She pauses when she realizes what she said, after everything, and elaborates.]
I mean, it's okay here, just not okay there. You know what I mean, right? At... least you have this place, even if it's kinda... [Well, it's a lot of different things, and most of her descriptors aren't good.]
I just don't understand how someone could... just do that kind of thing to so many people. What the hell.
no subject
A-actually, Teruteru-chan might've made all his Ultimate Despair food out of...
[...
Well, there's only one logical ending to that. And it has her pausing for a second.
But she shakes her head again, trying to get the thought out of her brain -
Before she leaps back off the bench onto her paws, holding tight to Makoto's hand before taking it in both of hers.]
It doesn't matter why she did it. Right? It doesn't matter, now that Ibuki's not there anymore!
What matters is what she can do here and now. And right here and right now...
Ibuki wants you to know that she's really excited to someday be your friend.
Having people here who listen to what I say and take me seriously... is really, really new.
And it's even newer to have someone who wants to learn from me, so...
It's really important that you know how excited I am for that, okay?
To someday really, really be your friend.
[... She's talking like they're not. Or even haven't been, despite the things Ibuki's done, like inviting her wholeheartedly into her club and buying her a brand new guitar...]
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It does matter, though. She still did it to you, y'know? Even if things are different here, that doesn't change what happened in the past...
[But then she listens to how Ibuki is talking, like they weren't friends already, like... what? It's like she's already assumed that Makoto's decided to just not be her friend anymore, or change her stance on things for whatever reason. She's not going to change her stance on trusting Ibuki, nor is she going to change her stance on them being friends. She's determined for that. Ibuki opened up to her, after all.
Ibuki may have done bad things but that doesn't necessarily make her a bad person. She obviously regrets and wants to do better. Things are different, right? So it's... not fine, but Makoto can appreciate the effort put forth by them to be better and do better and that goes a long way in the end.
It's still kind of hard to wrap her mind around the scale of the problem, she's never thought of anything on that scale that wasn't just performing on the world stage.]
Oi, don't talk like we aren't friends, Ibuki-chan. You're acting like I've already made my mind up that we aren't friends now! We are. Even if you didn't do good things, you're trying to be better and do better. If I weren't your friend, I wouldn't have sat here and listened.
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But no, this runs a little... deeper than that.
In fact, she looks at her for a moment with a bit of surprise, still holding her hand with both of hers.]
... We're already friends?
Even though we've only known each other a li'l while? We're already friends?
Really?
[See this look? This face of surprise at being called friends?
This is the face of a woman with trust issues deeper than the Grand Canyon, Makoto.
(You can thank her old band for that.)]
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[Hooboy Ibuki, there is so much to unpack about you and she's not even sure where to start. But she's fine with the work and trying to understand. She's determined to be Ibuki's friend, and this ain't gonna stop her.]
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Aren't people usually still strangers by now?
[That's said as she finally lets go of Makoto's hand -
In favor of bringing her own up in front of her, shyly pushing a couple fingertips together.
Yeah, there's a lot behind all that hair, but hey. If Makoto's willing to try and unpack it, she'll have a pretty loyal friend for life!
Just ask Sonia.]
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i keep coming back to this icon when she's being serious, ugh
but it's a good icon
but it's one of the only serious ones i haaaaave
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